Controlling Relationships Being engaged to a controlling person sometimes causes you to lose control in every aspect of your life. Passive people like myself usually find controlling partners. Controlling people like my ex-fiancé usually find passive partners. We are "perfect" for each other. Being passive, I'm quite happy to be left alone. I sometimes don't have much to say, and I have to admit I sometimes can seem to be deaf when you try to discuss problems with me. While on the other hand a controlling person makes constant demands on their partners. They have much to say, and they can act like they think they've been elected to tell everyone else how to live their l